Instead of flowers or chocolates, for Valentine’s Day this year we decided to get our readers something from the heart…a list of demented romance movies that will make for slightly uncomfortable but ultimately rewarding dates on this day of Cupid’s fatal arrow.
Let the Right One in
This Swedish vampire movie was everything that Twilight wanted to be but isn’t–terrifying, beautiful, twisted, dark and rooted in love and relationships. The film raises the bar to new levels as to what a vampire movie can be and how horror movies can affect us emotionally. What we eventually discover in the film is that what’s most terrifying is the haunting adolescent love between the two main characters. Let the Right One In is not only one of the greatest vampire movies ever made, it’s the perfect romantic horror movie. We can guarantee you that when the main character Oskar asks Eli to be his girlfriend and she responds “I’m not a girl”…you will be floored.
Basic Instinct is the perfect erotically charged thriller to watch with your significant other. Equal parts Hitchcock and seductive voyeurism, this movie is guaranteed to turn your girlfriend into a dominatrix or your boyfriend into a softcore porn star. It’s a cinematic wet dream for thriller fans that delivers on nearly every level, including a monumentally perfect screenplay.
At the heart of Cloverfield is a love story with a gigantic monster thrown into the mix. The true essence of the film is driven by the main characters race across New York to save the girl he slept with. Sure, the love story could of been ripped directly from a daytime soap opera, but it hooks you in. This unrequited love theme takes what could of been another mediocre monster film and turns Cloverfield into a near found footage masterpiece. This movie is also a perfect date movie for horror fans whose significant others happen to dislike scary movies.
Natural Born Killers
Natural Born Killers may be Oliver Stone’s best film. It also may be one of the most demented love stories ever told. Is it audacious that we included it instead of Bonnie and Clyde, its unquestioned inspiration? Perhaps. But modernity is all the rage these days. Natural Born Killers is full of psychotic vignettes and scathing commentaries on the American Nightmare, all the while featuring two young serial killers who are deeply in love.
Wild at Heart
There are few better examples of raging tumultuous, Wuthering Heights-style tragic love than David Lynch’s Wild at Heart. Nicholas Cage and Laura Dern literally sizzle together on screen. And Willem Dafoe tantalizes with his noxious Bobby Peru character. If you like the romantic adrenaline of Natural Born Killers mixed with the primal dementia of Blue Velvet, this Bud’s for you.
Tromeo and Juliet
Troma Films producer Loyd Kaufman’s transgressive interpretation of Shakespeare’s classic love story features an abusive alcoholic father, a cow monster with a 3 foot penis, and virtually every form of sexual deviance you can imagine. Perfect for Valentine’s Day. Full disclosure: we’re extremely excited for the remake of The Toxic Avenger!